She awoke to her phone ringing. Her mother was calling from WalMart. Did she want her to pick up some eggs?
YES! Sweet Jesus I have been saved!
Wait what the hell is mom doing out AGAIN? There was no stopping this woman, and she knew it. 15 minutes later, she was cooking breakfast with real eggs after yelling from her doorway,
“Go home mom! Sanitize! Stop going outside, it’s a pandemic!” She knew her words fell on deaf and dogged ears.
***
Walking into the bedroom she heard the familiar pitter-patter-pitter-patter of floofy feet on the hardwood- it was her most fluffy, black and white cat who used every opportunity to beg for food. She leaped up onto the dresser then up into the closet where all the cat furniture was housed.
Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew?
Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew?
Whenever she feigned starvation she used her tiniest of mews. She tried with all her might to morph back into the tiny kitten she once was, in order to maximize cuteness, and in turn, maximize treats.
When she picked up the plastic tub of treats she realized something- it wasn’t full.
Her cats were fat and complete beggars.
And worst of all- she was a push over.
Crap. She knew what this meant.
***
During the past five days she vacillated between two states of being. The first being completely freaked out by the pandemic- a result of watching too much of the teletube people and the constant stream of numbers, maps, and “breaking news”. The pandemic had its own icon that would zoom across the screen, accompanied by frightening background music not unlike that of a horror film. The second state was one of nonchalance, which occurred when she went outside, or drove around the neighborhood.
As she pulled into the parking lot of the pet store, she fell into the second. People were out! Lots of people! People were doing normal-people-things.
She procured enough treats for a few weeks, and extra canned food. Feeling accomplished, it was time for her afternoon snooze.
***
When she awoke the telepeople quickly sucked her back into the former state. What would happen in the prisons? In the detention centers where thousands of immigrants were trapped? This was the perfect petri dish for this virus.
Health care workers didn’t have enough protective gear and were making masks out of whatever materials they could find.
This, for the supposed “greatest nation in the world.”
Other countries were closing their borders to us. US! Weren’t we the ones trying to keep the unwanted out? Priding ourselves on our great breed of people?
And all of this while the “great leader” remarked that he had no problem with people calling the virus the “Chinese virus.” His racist dog whistle was already being heeded as attacks of people of Asian descent circulated on the internet machines. Citizens beaten because of their appearance; children bullied and being accused of being “bat-eaters.” People loved a good origin story, but this one was simply not true.
People did not care.
This country was not “great.”
Poor mom!!! Mine is still working.
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